can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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