I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
