He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
NoShamevember. You game?
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
