I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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