You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Randomize
