whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
