So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
