She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
