That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
