dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Randomize
