He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Dick very happy bro
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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