please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize