Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
