So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
