I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Randomize
