Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
