It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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