im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
