There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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