Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
