I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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