I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
