it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
