I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Bring me that man meat
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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