At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
