Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
