Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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