a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
This is classic penis vs brain.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
