even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
