So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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