never play flip cup with pint glasses
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize