if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Randomize
