i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
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