Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
My balls are so social today.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
