she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize