Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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