Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
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