allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize