Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
