Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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