can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Randomize