She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Randomize
