I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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