Ambien. No doubt about it.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
