used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
