Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
