Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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