I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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