how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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