You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
