Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
My ass is underappreciated
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
